guṇadhikāt mudam lipsedanukrośam guṇādhamāt
maitrīṃ samānād anvicchen na tāpair abhibhūyate
“With someone who has greater qualities (guṇa-adhikāt), one should be pleased (“mudaṃ”),
with someone who has lesser qualities (guṇa-adhamāt), one should be compassionate (“anukrośaṃ”) and
with someone equal (samānāt) one should desire friendship (“maitriṃ”).
Thus fostering no desires one is never affected by tribulations.”
The best advice that can be given.
Indeed, it is so good that I wonder if anybody can actually follow it.
There is another translation, which I give for the sake of variety, and accuracy:
“One should feel delighted to see a person of superior merit;
should feel compassion to one who is inferior; and
should desire friendship with one’s equals.
(In this one) one is not overwhelmed with afflictions.”
guṇa should be translated “virtue” or simply “good quality” or “desirable quality”.
The simple meaning is quality, attribute, characteristic – but it is often understood as virtue, thus guṇavat means endowed with good qualities or virtues or merits or excellences, excellent, perfect.
The last line in the first version is not entirely accurate.
The original simply says: na tāpair abhibhūyate
There is no mention of “fostering no desires”.
abhibhūya means superiority.
abhibhū means to overcome, overpower, predominate, conquer, surpass, overspread; to attack, defeat, humiliate.
The meaning is that by adopting such a frame of mind, one doesn’t experience intense pain, i.e. one is not overcome by suffering.
As human beings, we all come across three basic types of humans:
1. those who are more virtuous, or have more qualities, than us,
2. those who are just as good as ourselves, and then
3. those who have fewer virtues, or fewer good qualities.
This brilliant saying from the Shrīmad Bhāgavat Purāṇa deals with this particular aspect of life – this universal experience of every human being.
It is almost as relevant, as lofty, and as profound, as the Golden Rule – and should be considered a pertinent, valuable rule in itself.
Generally, people treat the first category with slavishness, obsequity, & a deep, inner resentment.
There is often jealousy mingled with awe, in their minds.
They deal with the second category with condescension, rudeness, & even downright nastiness.
Even with those as good as themselves, people often harbor an inner desire to see the other’s downfall – they almost look for something which lessens the other’s respect in their, or the world’s eyes.
Indeed, the desire to see some unknown or undiscovered fault, some failing, something despicable, some crack in the wall, some hitherto unnoticed tear in the fabric – is present in the minds of many when it comes to both, their betters and their equals.
There is an intrinsic need to see oneself better than others – and very often we desire this self-admiration, or self-aggrandizement, at the cost of another’s weakness, or failing, or fault.
Nobody wants to feel lesser than another.
People do not feel delighted to see someone better than themselves: the feeling of being inferior is painful, and the internal being of man fights it at every step, unless he’s given in to complete slavishness – & a sort of slippery, slimy, fawning toadiness of character.
People are rude & hurtful, or condescending, even cruel, to those who are lesser than them.
And they tend to compete with those who are as good as them.
All these attitudes of the mind ought to be avoided.
More than that, one should transform one’s inner response altogether, into something benevolent.
One needs to change one’s perspective.
It is a good thing that some people have more virtues than you: you can learn from them, you can emulate them.
They inspire you with the confidence that one can be good – that goodness exists in the world – that it is possible for there to be goodness.
It is unfortunate people have fewer virtues: you must be considerate, thoughtful, not hasty in judgment, not harsh in your words, not cause them affliction or anger.
We don’t know what they’ve been through – what they’ve suffered – what they’ve learnt & seen in their lives.
Our spitefulness or coldness may just make the other person worse – at any rate, it isn’t going to bring him on to the right track.
Your spitefulness neither makes you, nor the other other person, better, or happier.
And then it is good that some people are as good as you: there is nothing to fear from them.
This principle from the Shrīmad Bhāgavat Purāṇa demands the highest maturity, patience, reflection, and self-control.
Doesn’t this counsel sum up almost the essence of human virtue?
No resentment – no arrogance – no combativeness.
To be free of self-depredation – to be free of haughtiness or hubris – to be free of envy or one-upmanship.
Free yourself from the desire to pull down another person – to find fault – to nitpick – to keep seeing or finding or desiring or looking for something wrong in another – and to develop benevolence – i.e., to use a contemporary term, to develop a “positive approach” to every sort of person, who fits into any one of the three broad categories of an individual’s experience.
I think this saying encapsulates the essentials of the morals of human interaction brilliantly.
